Sunday, December 5, 2010

"Have you joined Weight Watchers before?"

I've joined Weight Watchers...again.  After I've filled out the forms, the leader hands me the starting packet and asks the dreaded question (with her all good intentions), "Have you joined Weight Watchers before? Would you like stay after the meeting so we explain the program?"

I must have been ten the first time I walked into a Weight Watchers meeting.  I'm sure my mom helped me get signed up but as the meetings progressed, I biked down to them myself.  If I had a bad week, I would go home, be frustrated with myself and often eat badly and struggle with exercise because I was angry with myself.  If I had a so so week I would take a deep breath, go home and think about how I could improve.  If I had a good week (read - a loss) I would stop by Baskin Robbins on the way home for a celebratory ice cream.

Spoiler alert:  28 years later.  I'm still overweight.  I'm sure you're shocked. do you make the emoticon guy with rolling eyes?

To be technically correct, I am an obese diabetic with high cholesterol, metabolic syndrome, hypo-active thyroid, the beginnings of high blood pressure, fertility problems and gastric reflux (and a cupboard full of pills).  Oh...and extra unwanted facial hair. 

The positive correlation between the prior health list and the reality being overweight and under-exercised...100%.  Even the hair. 

The other uber-important correlation to recognize is the one between the prior list and me.  In the base of who I am, I am lazy, disorganized and have little stamina.  And major problems with how I deal with food if you hadn't clued into that fact.

But...I am also thoughtful, smart, kind and worth the effort of trying another time.  So here I am again. be fair...still. 

Throughout my life I have been interested and have joined several types of team sports.  I've been involved in swimming, basketball, and volleyball.  And I sat on the bench in every single one of them.  I'm not particularly talented when it comes to sports in general.  I'm not very fast, very strong or very coordinated.  The water does not make impressive splashes as I glide through the water.  It is merely displaced by my mass.  The basketball does not swish through the basket when I aim and shoot. It makes a lovely ting when it hits the rim.  The volleyball barely reaches the net when I serve.  It usually just hits the ground and the other team gets their turn.  But I've always understood the techniques involved in making these things happen.  Eventually in the sports I joined, I would end up shifting over to being more of a junior coach instead of an athlete on the team.  I excelled at comprehending the necessary techniques and being able to communicate and aid my teammates improve their game.  Understanding the game was always easy to me.  Execution of the game is my weak spot.

Do I need to stay after the meeting to have you help me understand the program?

Nope.  I got the program.  I could probably run the meetings and would excel at helping the other people get motivated and lose weight.  Executing the plan?  I've got some work to do.

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